Originally published May 11, 2016

Talk of money, especially as it relates to us personally, can really be a taboo topic.  Whether it’s asking how much your friend’s new purse cost or telling your neighbor how much you bought your house for, we’re afraid to ask and we’re afraid to tell.

Are we worried about what others will think?  Depending on who you’re talking to, the same sale or purchase could be too much or not enough.

Here’s a simple example:

Just the other day on social media, a friend posted a before and after of her house’s new paint job.  Another friend who was looking to get his house painted, asked what company did the work and how much it cost if she didn’t mind sharing.

It’s that last part that caught my attention.

While it’s a completely normal and polite to be extra sensitive when asking such “personal” information as how much it costs to get your house painted, I wonder why it’s so personal?

Income: the taboo topic

There’s something about income that’s super personal, too.  People are afraid to ask.  People are afraid to tell.

The big question is why?  Why are we so sensitive about people knowing our income?

Are we worried that it will make them feel bad for us because we don’t make “enough?”

Are we worried that others will feel bad about themselves because they don’t make “enough?”

Are we worried that if someone knows our income they will judge the way we budget our money?

Most people don’t make their personal finances public each month.  We have put ourselves in a unique situation. I’m definitely not advocating that everyone go public with all of their numbers.

Honestly, I’m not necessarily advocating that you be completely open about your money, but I’m just curious about why it’s all overly hush-hushed.

Why is money-talk so personal?

What is it that makes us sheepish to talk about things that involve money?

Why is it more socially acceptable to ask about a newlywed couple’s plans for having children than to ask them what they are paying for rent?

These are real questions.  I would love to hear your opinion.  Feel free to share you feelings about disclosing income in the comments at the end.

In the meantime, I’m going to take a stab at it.

I would say that it’s because our income is so (wrongly) tied to our worth and value as a individuals.

Here’s a non-finance example to illustrate my point:

When my younger brother was taking college entrance exams back in high school, he was naturally really curious what others’ scores were on the test.  Knowing that my husband is super smart, he was particularly interested in knowing what my husband’s scores were.  His curiosity came through often in conversation, but he never came out and asked.

My husband, who is never one to brag, was not going to flash his nearly perfect score.  However, had my brother come right out and asked, my husband would have had no problem revealing his score.

The same goes with income.  If you were to ask about my husband’s income, he would tell you, even when it was quite low.

In my husband’s case, I think the reason why he doesn’t feel like income or test scores are taboo is that he doesn’t tie his self-worth to those numbers.  On top of that, he is not worried about what others may think of him.  By the same token, he is non-judgmental about others’ numbers too.

Perhaps we keep money, especially income, a taboo topic out of insecurity?

 Is keeping quiet about finances a bad thing?

Our social media feeds are overflowing with overshares.  We’re so inundated with TMI, that sometimes you wonder if people do keep anything private these days.  Maybe keeping money as a taboo topic isn’t a bad thing.  Perhaps keeping everyone’s income hush-hush helps us to see others as equals.

In some ways though, I think it’s unfortunate that money-talk is taboo.  I think we can really learn a lot from one another about personal finance.

I think we do ourselves a disservice when we keep our debt a secret.  We won’t get the support we need from family and friends if no one knows the struggle we’re going through.

Between student loans, car loans, and credit card debt, debt affects a huge group of people.  Yet we all hide behind our smiles and pretend that finances are hunky dory, which isn’t helping anyone.

What do I propose?

If you thought I was building up to an initiative of social reform or of how I plan to change things from my little corner of the globe, don’t be disappointed.  I’m not advocating that you write your salary on your forehead or start asking nosy financial questions.

Instead, I just want you to ask yourself why income and money-talk are or are not taboo for you.  Then ask yourself if you like those reasons.  If you do, then keep it up.  If not, decide what you’ll change.

Just for the record, I do (usually) conform to these social norms and don’t ask or volunteer salary details right off the bat in real life (obviously this blog is a different story).  I am, however, more open about finances in person than most people.  By not being shy or apologetic about talking about money, others often open up too.  And I daresay they find it refreshing to talk about money, even if society thinks it’s taboo.

How about you?

• Should talk of income or other money issues be taboo?  Why or why not?
• What are the pros and cons of not shying away from money-talk?

The post Why income is a taboo topic appeared first on Six Figures Under.

Now that we have lived in our house for a year and a half, it seems like every cupboard and closet needs to be decluttered and reorganized.  I just went through the children’s books last week and have two big boxes of books to donate.

I have been thinking lately about where I lie on the spectrum between being a minimalist and a hoarder.

The post below was originally shared in May 2015, but I wanted to share it again since it’s what I’ve been mulling over lately.

What do hoarders and minimalists have in common?

Admittedly not a lot.  In fact they are pretty much at opposite ends of the “stuff” spectrum. The lifestyle of a hoarder would drive a minimalist insane.  Likewise, a true pack rat would go bonkers in a minimalist’s world.

Hoarders and minimalists have at least one thing in common: Frugality.

By definition, frugal is:

Economical in use or expenditure; prudently saving or sparing; not wasteful

Not all hoarders and minimalists are frugal.

While individual cases and motives vary, I think the mentalities behind hoarding and minimalism both demonstrate key components of frugality.

The Frugal Hoarder

Painting the image of a hoarder (or “pack rat” to put it more gently) isn’t hard, thanks to television’s exposure through shows like Hoarders and Extreme Couponing.  The extreme situations that make it to the screen, however, are definitely less frugal than your average pack rat mentality.  Set aside the extremes and picture a pack rat that you know and love.

Frugal hoarders accumulate stuff that they feel may possibly be useful to themselves or others at some time in the future.  They have a difficult time getting rid of anything because they are afraid they will want or need the item in the future.

Whether it was given to them for free or purchased on a great deal, frugal pack rats take pride in how little it cost them to acquire the goods.  The low price itself is often the sole justification for bringing the items home.

Looking at the definition above, frugal hoarders feel that getting rid of something that could possibly be useful would be wasteful. They believe that saving stuff is saving money.

The Frugal Minimalist

Minimalists hit frugality from a different angle.  Instead of focusing intensely on the economical expenditure, they are economical in the use of things.  Minimalism, as far as stuff is concerned, is defined by William Morris’s quote, “Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful.”

Minimalists are also not wasteful, another classic component of frugality’s definition.  Instead of preventing waste by saving everything like a pack rat, minimalists avoid acquiring things that would not be used.  To a minimalist, having something that isn’t useful is wasteful, not only because of the money spent, but also the space it takes up, the maintenance costs and opportunity cost (what else your money and space could be doing).

Frugal minimalists save money by just not buying much.  Their purchases are intentional and well thought-out.  They believe they are saving money by not saving stuff.

Where are you on the spectrum?

Most people aren’t one extreme or the other.  We all have different priorities and tendencies, but we probably lean one way or the other.

You might be a frugal hoarder if…

…you find yourself justifying clearance purchases with “I might need this someday.”

…you can find plenty to buy at any given garage sale.

…you buy more at the thrift store than you donate.

…you buy multiples because the deal is just “too good.”

…people call you when they are moving or downsizing to see if you want their stuff.

…you hang onto your children’s outgrown clothes for potential future children.

You might be a frugal minimalist if…

…you get rid of potentially useful things to save space.

…you shop with a list and stick to it.

…you donate more to the thrift store than you buy.

…you only buy what you absolutely are sure that you need.

…you love giving away useful items to friends.

…you pass along baby clothes right after a child outgrows them.

I would say (and my husband would agree) that I lean toward the hoarder side of frugality (and his tool collection would reveal the same thing about him).

For example, my newborn daughter is wearing clothes that my 7-year-old daughter wore seven years ago.  Those clothes have traveled 3,500 miles with us in those seven years.  Thinking about the space that they took up for those seven years and the effort of moving them across the country twice, makes the minimalist mindset sound appealing.

Still, I have a hard time passing up “free” things that may be of use in the future, even if I have to store them.  And when it comes to food, I believe in being prepared, which is why I prefer to call it stocking up rather than hoarding.

If you are feeling overwhelmed and frustrated with all of the stuff in your house or you feel like you’re always cleaning but nothing ever seems clean, then you probably have a clutter problem.  If you’ve tried to declutter in the past but have gotten burned out, then Step-by-Step Decluttering will be great for you!  After listening to the audio-book, I was totally encouraged and motivated to get to work.  Sarah gives clear methods and strategies to work through the decluttering process without feeling overwhelmed.

How about you?

• What kind of frugal are you?
• Have you had experience moving to a different spot on the frugality spectrum?

The post Hoarder, Minimalist, or Something in the Middle? appeared first on Six Figures Under.

Thanks to Erin from Living EZ for this guest post!

Do you feel like you slowly inch forward toward your financial goals?

Does it seem like everyone around you reaches their goals faster?

Are you trying trying to save money, live frugally, and spend less, yet you slip into old habits more than you want to admit?

Perhaps, you take two steps forward and one step backward each month. Regardless, preparation is the key to success, whether it’s sticking to a budget or life with a newborn. This is why many of us have monthly and even weekly plans.

However, if you still struggle to stay focused, motivated, and on track with your long term goals, you need to make daily goals.

Setting daily priorities each morning gives you the willpower and confidence you need to stick to your food prep schedule, say no to that Frappaccino, and put down those impulse buys in the checkout line. After all, a successful financial month consists of many consecutive successful days.

It’s the boring, unrelenting, day-to-day frugality where we achieve our long term goals. Unfortunately, many of us sleep through crucial opportunities to prepare ourselves for daily victory. The key is to adding (or revamping) your morning routine!

I speak from experience. Over the past 6 months, my life has been transformed (yes, a very extreme word, but also very accurate) by my morning rituals. Waking up an hour earlier allows me to focus on self-development and concentrate on identifying and achieving daily intentions. While I didn’t set out to save money through my new routine, I realized this practice helped us save a lot in various ways!

When I started reading Six Figures Under, my family had just relocated to Sydney, our rent more than doubled, and the cost of living jumped 40% higher than where we lived in the North Carolina. While higher paying jobs boosted our income, I suffered sticker shock constantly, and we struggled to maintain our previous way of life.

I started searching for, and implementing, ways to reign in our spending, such as meal planning, grocery budgeting, and looking for free activities, like never before. Despite all this effort, we inconsistently hit our financial targets.

Money-Saving Mindset

Now, I consistently spend time outlining our necessary expenses, and more importantly, intentionally focusing on how we want to spend our money (traveling), which allows us to maintain a comfortable lifestyle without sacrificing our savings goals. It also helps my partner (mostly) remember that those amazing coffees by the office add up to airfare.

Here are a few ways that implementing a morning routine has saved us money:

Impulse Buys – Everyday I focus on my goals, and view each day within the grand scheme of our longer-term plan. Think of it as the “zoomed out” perspective. I look beyond small, daily struggles with super-sales and treats to the benefits of consistently staying on track.  Before making time for my morning reflection, I succumbed to the occasional impulse buy at the grocery store when I felt stressed, overwhelmed, or just wanted a little something to perk my mood. I indulged in small novelty items – always on sale, so I could rationalize the deviation from plan as an awesome “deal.” However, these small purchases add up, and their sole purpose served to improve my mood, when I would have felt better celebrating our progress towards our next financial milestone.

Planning – In a day filled with buzzing technology and a rambunctious toddler, I treasure my morning quiet time to think strategically. I love creating a long to-do list and methodically checking off each item. My morning ritual is structured so that I quickly identify what I need to accomplish at work, home, and while shopping. Instead of becoming overwhelmed with a huge list, I narrow it down to the single most important item to complete each morning. When I finish my big goal of the day before 7am (… perhaps that’s too optimistic, at least 11), I feel productive and inspired for the rest of the day.

Motivation and Information – I read for at least ten minutes each morning. Sometimes I catch up on blogs, read a chapter of a parenting book, or other actionable and inspiring advice. Often times, I stumble across great ideas that save me money – like this stellar article on how to get babysitting for free (babysitting rates in our area start at $25/hour, which makes for extremely rare date nights). Regardless of the practical help I may receive, this time increases my resolve and commitment to our long term goals.

Getting Started

Now that you are eager to experience the extraordinary benefits from your new morning routine, let’s dive into starting your habit. First of all, a great morning routine begins the night before, you must create an environment conducive to success.

1. Mental environment – Before you go to sleep, think about what you will accomplish in the morning. Get excited about waking up to be productive and proactive.
2.  Physical environment – Decide on what will cue you to get out of bed earlier than usual. Now that we are entering winter in Sydney, I moved my phone/alarm clock to the far side of the room. If my phone stays on my bedside table, I just can’t summon the willpower to get out of my warm bed. However, if I stumble out of bed half-asleep to turn off my alarm, I simply start my routine without too much internal protest.

A Basic Routine

Start with a 20 minute routine. As you progress, you will discover what activities work best you, but I suggest following structure to begin:

Wake up – Drink a cup of water

Physical Activity – 5 minutes. This can be so easy to overthink, but really the whole point is to get moving. Simply stretching out a littles and trying to touch your toes will energize your body and mind before you start thinking. Try 1 minute each of jumping jacks, lunges, planks, running in place, or yoga. Seriously, do not stress out about this!

Write/Dream – 5 minutes. Pull out a journal/notepad and write down your goals for the week. Refine this list into daily goals, and lastly, pick just one thing to accomplish each morning. On subsequent days, write about your envisioned future. What are you working towards and why is success vital? What actions will you take today to ensure this success?

Read/Learn – 10 minutes. Grab that devotional that you worked on for a few days and then stopped, or maybe Stephanie’s awesome book – anything that will provide positivity and value as you work toward your goals. In the first few weeks, I highly suggest not reading on your phone, computer, or tablet because it is a gateway drug to getting distracted by email, social media, and other notifications.

That’s it! It’s simple, but I truly believe in the power of taking small actions every single day because we are seeing the results in our family.

One last thing as you start your routine, social support is so crucial to nurture a new, fragile habit. To help with this, my husband and I lead a free 45 Day Positive Mornings Challenge where we help you transform your goals into powerful intentions to help you develop sustainable positive habits. There is an entire community of Positive People offering daily encouragement and support. All you have to do is commit five focused minutes each morning to being your ideal self. For additional support and accountability on your personal and financial goals, learn more here.

Erin is an American expat exploring in Sydney with her husband and daughter. She also co-hosts free intentional morning challenges over at Positive Mornings. The next free challenge begins on June 20th, so visit the site to learn more and sign up. You can also check out her personal blog at Living EZ.

The post Creating a Mindset for Daily Financial Success appeared first on Six Figures Under.

Whether you’re paying off a large amount of debt or have a lofty savings goal, staying focused for the long haul can be a challenge.  In order to make noticeable progress toward your goal, you have to keep at it day in and day out.  Some goals (like ours) are years in the making.  That’s a lot of days of being focused!

If you’re like me, some days you’ll feel energized and ready to sprint toward your goal.  You’re willing to give up whatever is necessary to reach your goal and you don’t let anything stand in your way.  You see your financial journey as a race that you’re winning.  You don’t even get discouraged when haters mock you and are eager to see you fail.

Then there are other days.  Days where you don’t want to pack another sack lunch as long as you live.  Days where you want to eat steak instead of meatless spaghetti.  Days where you doubt that your sacrifices will ever really make a difference.

It’s normal to have days where saving money (and all that it entails) makes your grumpy.  You’re just plain sick of saving and scrimping.

I was having one of those days yesterday.  While my idea of splurging isn’t going to the mall (what’s that?) and buying new shoes or designer handbags, I really wanted to pay someone to clean my kitchen, do the laundry, and make dinner last night.  If takeout were an option, I surely would have splurged for that, but the 40 minute drive with hungry, grumpy kids didn’t sound like it would improve the situation  (and that wouldn’t have solved the laundry or messy kitchen either).

In my case, my patient husband handled the kids (who happened to be extra exhausting) when he got home while I channeled my frustration into cleaning up the kitchen and living room.  It’s amazing how quickly a clean house can change my outlook and motivation.

Here are some ideas to help you keep focused even when you want to splurge:

Look at How Far You’ve Come

Normally we want to look forward, but it’s beneficial to take a look back every now and then to see your progress.  When you are tempted to splurge, take a look at how far you’ve come.  You will be inspired by your own success and you won’t want to wreck what you’ve done.

Also, be sure to remember the “why” of your goal.  A solid “why” behind your goal can be really powerful!

Focus on Something Else

Wracking your brain for another way to reduce your spending or yet another way to earn money– though sometimes energizing– can also be exhausting.  When you’ve taken frugal to the limits, it’s healthy to give the money-saving side of your brain a break.

While your tendency may be to break out of your frugal habits, try diverting your focus with a good alternative that doesn’t involve spending.  You could get lost in an inspiring book or do some cleaning and organizing around the house.

Make a List

Depending on your personality, making a list might just make your day.  I am a natural list-maker.  When I’m feeling overwhelmed, one of the best ways for me to “take a load off” is to make a list.  Trying to hold all my “to-do”s or grand ideas in my head hurts my brain sometimes.  Getting it all out on paper helps me relax and deal with life more rationally.

Lists aren’t limited to groceries or “to-do”s.  You could even make a list of things you would love to splurge on right now.  Once you’ve written down the things you want to spend money on, you might find you’ve got the urge out of your system.

Indulge in a Little Splurge

I’m giving you permission (not that you need my permission) to a little splurge every now and then.  When you realize there are seasons to save and seasons to spend you will learn to give yourself grace.  You can’t do everything all of the time.  It’s okay to simplify.  For me a simple splurge on cold cereal or store-bought bread can lighten my load and turn my outlook around.

Reassess your Goal

When a goal is overly ambitious either in scope or time frame, it can be more frustrating than fruitful.  If your goal is too far out of reach.  You might consider breaking it down into more manageable chunks.  Having a more attainable goal (even if it is only a piece of the greater goal), will help you to stay focused instead of falling into a funk.

I’m thankful that my grumpy days are few and far between.  I’m blessed with a husband who also has a positive outlook and rarely gets in a funk.

What About You?

• What keeps you going when you’re sick of saving and want to splurge?
• What helps you resist the urge to splurge? (Ha– that rhymes!)

You’ll Also Enjoy:

The post When You’re Sick of Saving (and Want to Splurge) appeared first on Six Figures Under.

In our “Don’t Buy It” series during our no-spend month, we’ve talked about some alternatives to buying like getting things for free, borrowing what you need, or making things yourself.

There is another option which might be obvious or it might not even cross your mind.  It’s a less common solution for my generation than for my grandparents’ generation.  And it may really throw the rising generation for a loop.  It’s not complex or complicated.

Instead of buying something, do without it!

Whether it’s because you don’t have the cash, haven’t made the item a priority in your budget, or just want to simplify, doing without something you want (or even need) can be good for you.

Here are four ways that going without can benefit you:

Increase Creativity

When you go without something, you are forced to find a way around it.  Maybe you’ll use something else in a different way or completely change your routine to eliminate the need for something.  After all, necessity is the mother of invention.  Doing without provides an opportunity to stretch yourself to come up with a solution.

Learn Patience

In a society of fast food and high-speed internet, we are trained to be impatient.  Not many people are born patient.  It’s something we need to learn.  Waiting for something, rather than getting it right away, makes us appreciate and value that thing more.   In fact, patience is a quality that will be valuable in all areas of our lives.

Build Character

Putting off our wants and our needs can be hard.  Pretty much anything that is hard to do is said to build character.  We are also helping our kids to build character.  Kids who learn to do without will be much better off when they leave the nest and real life hits, than the kids who never had to make sacrifices or go without.  Giving our kids (or ourselves) everything they want does them a disservice.

Decrease Expenses

Needing and using less stuff costs less.  Plain and simple.  If you can consistently live on less, then you will consistently have more to put toward debt or into savings.  Not only will you save more for your future, but your future will require less because you have made a habit of living on less.

How do you “do without it”?

In a society with a “buy-it-now” and “have-it-all” mentality, it will take conscious thought and intention to do without.  Putting off our wants and needs is not our first instinct.  It takes some serious self-discipline.

Before you buy something, ask yourself if it’s something you could do without.  I know that sounds very simplistic, but this is something that most people just don’t do.  We are consumers with a capital C.  If we want something, we get it.  We even take on debt to get it.  We can change our habits one purchase at a time.

If you are willing to try to go without that want or need, set a time limit after which you can re-evaluate your decision to go without.  Having a “trial period” puts you under less pressure, so you’ll be more inclined to try to go without more things.

Delaying the purchase by putting the item you want or need on a list for a month (or longer) will help you determine how much you really want or need something.  Some things you might decide to purchase later down the road, but for those you don’t you’ll save time, space, and money.

Even for the things you end up buying later, you’ll build character and creativity in the mean time.  You can be more confident and intentional about the purchases you choose to make.  Plus, you’ll appreciate the item much more after having gone without it.

Small Examples

During our current no-spend month, we’re going without a few things that have been a little inconvenient, but very do-able.  Most of what we’re doing without are short term sacrifices, but they definitely make us grateful for the conveniences when we have them.

• We’ve been out of paper towels for most of the month.  I try not to use paper towels much anyway, but I like them for extra messy clean ups (or when I’m feeling lazy).
• We’re also out of freezer bags.  I wash them out and reuse them (except when I’m feeling lazy, then my husband washes them), but they eventually get holes and I toss them (I also toss them if they had meat in them).  We are out of freezer bags now, but as soon as I make blackberry jam I will free up a dozen of them (currently loaded with berries in the freezer), so I’m using other containers or plastic wrap in the mean time.
• Like I mentioned earlier this week, we’re out of milk now, so I’m going without.  The rest of the family is cool with drinking powdered milk from our food storage, but I’m not a big fan so I prefer to just wait it out.
• There have been several times when we’ve been in town and I would have normally bought a snack at the store (going to town is an all day event usually), but instead we just went without.

Even though these things are pretty minor in the grand scheme of things, making a conscious decision to go without them is increasing our creativity, teaching us patience, building our character, and saving us money!

How About You?

• When have you made the conscious decision to go without something?
• What have you learned from deliberately going without something?

You’ll Also Enjoy:

The post Don’t Buy It, Do Without It– 4 Reasons to Challenge Yourself to Go Without appeared first on Six Figures Under.

I went for years without buying bread.  Instead I made my own homemade bread.  One of the main reasons I decided to make all of our family’s bread was for the savings that came from not going to the store as frequently.  When you live in the boonies it’s nice to be able to take care of your own needs and not have to run to the store for staples.  While it was work (bread doesn’t bake itself), I got satisfaction in being self-sufficient.  To top it all off, homemade bread just tastes better!

When I got pregnant with out most recent bundle of joy (born in April), something had to give.  I was exhausted and felt awful for the first couple months.  I was lucky if I could manage to stand up in the kitchen while I packed lunches for my husband and kids, let alone make the sandwich bread from scratch.  It wasn’t too long into my pregnancy that I decided that buying bread was worth it to me now.

For a while I would feel guilty when I would notice people were pinning my post about how homemade bread is helping to pay off our law school debt.  What would readers think if they knew that I was *gasp* buying bread.

On top of buying bread, I tossed Cereal Sundays out the window.  Cold cereal went from being a special breakfast reserved just for Sunday mornings, to a daily staple of sanity.

I felt like a hypocrite.

In a post about debt fatigue, I talked about buying bread and said that sometimes it’s better to break your frugal rules a little and save your sanity.  At that point I hadn’t even told my family that I was expecting, but when my sister saw that I was getting store-bought bread, she called me and said “Are you pregnant?”  Another friend also told me that when she saw that I was too exhausted to make bread she figured I was expecting.

Seasons Change

Now that my baby is almost four months old, I am mostly back in the habit of making bread.  We also make hot breakfasts most days.  We’re back in the old frugal saddle again.

That’s great, but it doesn’t mean that I was bad for buying bread and cold cereal when I was pregnant or had a newborn.

Embracing the changes in our seasons will free us from the guilt that we tend to feel when we try to do it all or compare ourselves to others.

Seasons Create Habits

My sister has miserable pregnancies and throws up multiple times a day.  Mine aren’t anywhere near as bad.  When she was pregnant with her fourth, she started sending her husband’s dress shirts to the dry cleaner along with his suits.  The shirts don’t require dry cleaning and could be washed and ironed at home, but she was in such bad shape that she just couldn’t manage it.

She planned to go back to taking care of her husband’s shirts after the baby was born, but now that her baby is a year old, she’s still sending her husband’s dress shirts to the dry cleaner.  It’s within their budget, so she made the conscious decision to continue having his dress shirts professionally cleaned.  That is totally fine!  She tries to save money by looking for coupons locally and finding deals on sites like Groupon and Living Social.

It may be important to break out of some seasonal spending habits after the reason for the spending is over.  At other times, new seasons in our life can help us step outside our routine and re-evaluate long-standing habits to decide if they are still helpful in our current situation.

Seasons are Personal

It’s part of our nature to judge.  It’s tempting to look at someone and wonder why they are spending where they could save (or saving where they could spend).  Making decisions about how the seasons of life will affect our finances is personal for each of us.  Not only do we not understand what someone else’s “season” involves, but it just plain isn’t our business.

In fact, it’s actually refreshing to realize that we only have to be concerned with what we have control over. We each have the freedom to decide for ourselves, based on our own situation, whether it’s a time to save or a time to spend.

We all go through frugal fluctuations.  In some seasons of life we are willing to do more to save money than in others.  Are you in a spending season or a saving season?

How about you?

• How have different seasons in your life affected whether you spend or save?
• How have your habits (good or bad) been established in different seasons in your life?

You’ll Also Enjoy:

The post A Time to Save, A Time to Spend appeared first on Six Figures Under.

Why is it that some people can live on very little and be perfectly content, while others who seem to have plenty feel like they are dirt poor?

I’ll give you a clue: It has more to do with attitude than assets.

Do you find yourself feeling down because you don’t have the budget your neighbors seem to have? Does being frugal and pinching pennies leave you exhausted or depressed?

If so, you might be suffering from the “We can’t afford that” mentality.

What is the “We can’t afford that” mentality?

The “We Can’t Afford That” mentality is characterized by feeling controlled by– rather than in control of– your finances.   People claiming that they “can’t afford” things set themselves up as victims of their circumstances instead of acknowledging their choices in their financial life.  This negative mentality is emotionally, mentally, and physically taxing.  To make it worse, a victim’s attitude can keep us from setting and progressing toward financial goals.

Last year I wrote about why I never say “We can’t afford that.”  Although our income is very limited and our financial goals are big, we don’t let ourselves become victims.  We prefer to take responsibility for our financial choices rather than let our circumstances dictate our decisions.  If you haven’t seen it, go back and look at the post, as this is an extension of those ideas.

Killing the “We can’t afford that” mentality

If you want to make financial progress, it’s time to kill the “We can’t afford that” mentality.  If you don’t feel my same linguistic aversion to the phrase “can’t afford ______,” this might sound counter intuitive. You might think that saying “We can’t afford that” more often would increase financial traction.

I’m not saying that you should go splurge on whatever you want, whether you have the money or not.  Dropping the phrase “we can’t afford that” and the mentality that goes with it doesn’t mean you should go budget-less and spend irresponsibly.  Instead, your should recognize each financial decision as a choice.

Take ownership

Sometimes, especially when money is tight, we feel helpless and not in control.  It seems all of our money is spoken for and there are no choices left.  When we feel like this, it’s helpful to turn the situation around and make each transaction a choice.

Instead of looking at your income as a pie where everyone gets a slice but you, take control of the pie.  It’s your pie, so you can divvy it up as you please.  You could take it and go to Disneyland if you wanted or you could choose to pay the mortgage and the utilities.  You can make the choice.   Just remember that while you are free to choose your actions, you can’t choose the consequences of your actions.

Realizing that you are choosing to pay the rent or the mortgage is empowering.  Instead of feeling imposed on by that bill, make a firm decision to use your hard-earned funds to provide yourself and your family with a place to live.  When you pay the bill, do it exultantly, knowing that this exchange of cash is how you earn your home. No one is taking the money from you; you are choosing to give a certain amount away in order to fulfill your priorities.

Attitude

Tame your “wants” and learn to be content with what you have.  Change your focus from what you don’t have to what you do have.  You have much to be grateful for.  You really can be happy on any income. Constantly comparing yourself and your finances to others, guarantees you’ll be anything but happy.

Your kids will take note of your attitude and amplify it.  If you make yourself a victim of your finances, your kids will feel like money controls you.  If you focus on making choices with your money, your kids will learn that money is something we have control over.  Your attitude will determine whether your kids feel rich or poor.

Change your ways,  change your words

Solidify your change in attitude and perspective with a change in vocabulary.  Instead of saying that you “can’t afford” something, add words like “choose,” “decide,” and “want.”  It’s your money.  You call the shots!

There is a whole lot more to you and your life than your account balances.  Realizing that you are making choices (not having them thrust upon you) should ease the financial tension you feel.  Killing the “We can’t afford that” mentality is a matter of attitude and perspective.  Once you’ve conquered it, you’ll feel refreshed and empowered to face the financial obstacles in your future.  Taking a active and positive role in your finances will accelerate your progress to your goals.

How about you?

• Have you recognized a “We can’t afford that” mentality in yourself or others?
• How have you taken control of your finances by giving up the “We can’t afford that” mentality?

The post Killing the “We Can’t Afford That” Mentality appeared first on Six Figures Under.

I don’t claim to have it all together, but I enjoy a happy, balanced, and productive life.  I’m sure there are lots of contributing factors, but I believe much of it boils down to one day a week.

Sunday is my secret weapon to being productive and getting things done.  The funny thing is that I don’t actually do anything on my lengthy to-do list on Sunday.  I don’t even try to check anything off my list.

It might seem counter-intuitive that doing “nothing” for one day a week helps me get more done, but it makes a world of difference.

I can’t take credit for this idea though.  It dates back to the beginning.  After creating the earth and everything on it, God rested on the seventh day.  He has told us to do the same and I must say that keeping the Sabbath day holy is one of my favorite commandments!

I am a firm believer that we are blessed for being obedient to God’s commandments, and observing Sunday as a day of rest is no exception.  We are blessed with greater peace and happiness.  We are blessed to be able to get more done in the six remaining days than could normally be done in seven.  We have confidence that our needs will be met.

Even if you’re not religious, there are lots of great practical benefits to setting aside a day of rest each week.

Relax

One of the biggest things that sets Sunday apart from the rest of the week for us, is that we don’t work.  My husband doesn’t go to work and I don’t work on my blog or Etsy shop.  We don’t do housework.  When we were in school, we didn’t do homework either.

I’ve found that it’s really freeing to give yourself permission to ignore all of your work for a whole day.  The freedom is what brings real relaxation and renewal.  Since not doing work on Sunday is a commitment I’ve made, I feel zero guilt for not thinking about or doing any work.

Recharge

I don’t know about you, but when I’m crazy busy, I feel like a truck without brakes barreling down a big hill.  At first it’s invigorating and the wind feels nice, but I quickly realize that a crash is imminent.

When you’re constantly going, going, going without a rest, you are setting yourself up for a burnout.  Working without a break will take its toll on all aspects of your life.

Regularly taking time away from your work and your normal to-do list will keep you on your toes and energized to do your best the rest of the week.

Re-focus

Throughout the week we are pulled in so many directions.  Between work, school, activities, errands, hobbies, and housework, our schedules are jam-packed.  We spend lots of time on things that are good and needful (or sometimes just fun and frivolous), but on our day of rest we focus just on what’s most important.  For us, this means we spend the morning at church and the rest of the day at home as a family.

Having a day completely dedicated to what’s most important helps us to re-focus our priorities.  Spending a day focused on the big picture helps us to not get too far off track during the week.  Focusing on faith and family gives meaning to what we do the rest of the week.

You might think that “the weekend” in general is sufficient to qualify as your rest.  In my experience, weekends can be at least as jam-packed as weekdays, just with different activities.  Our Saturday to-do list is full of projects around the house and yard, fun family adventures, social get-togethers, and random errands.  While it’s a rest from the weekday grind, “the weekend” is not equivalent to the day of rest I’m talking about.

Do you have a day of rest?  Give Sunday a try.  It just might become your secret weapon too!

How about you?

• Have you noticed the benefits of taking a weekly day of rest?
• What is your secret to being productive?

Linked to Hit Me With Your Best Shot

The post Sunday: The Secret to Week-Long Productivity appeared first on Six Figures Under.

With a budget like ours, you might think that we would say that we can’t afford a lot of things.  While we talk openly about our limited finances, you won’t hear me say that I can’t afford something.

The phrase “I can’t afford” has always been an awkward one for me.  I avoid saying “I can’t afford,” not because of what it reveals about our finances, but because it’s negative, makes me the victim, and solicits financial advice.  There are psychological benefits of changing what you say.

It Has a Negative Connotation

When I hear the phrase “can’t afford,” it brings me back to middle school.  I always cringed when mean kids would pick on kids who obviously had less than them, and say “at least I can afford ___.”

I came from a middle class family, but I always felt protective of the kids who came from poorer families.  I didn’t care so much if people made fun of my off-brand shoes, but when less fortunate kids were teased with “you can’t even afford ___.”  That really rubbed me the wrong way.  Sometimes kids are really mean.

It’s Passive, Not Active

Saying that you can’t afford something puts you in a passive position.    You’re not in charge.  Someone or something else is in control.  You’re the victim.

Choosing not to spend money, on the other hand puts you in an active position.  You are in control!  It’s not your finances that are controlling you, but you taking responsibility for your money.  By voicing how I choose to spend my money, I feel empowered instead of victimized by my finances.

I Don’t Want Financial Advice

When I hear others talk about financial problems, my mind immediately tries to solve them.  I don’t always give unsolicited financial advice, but I usually think it.  I’m not judging, just trying to solve problems and find solutions.  If a friend complains “We just can’t afford ____,” then my mind will make a quick analysis of their spending to try to find a way for them to make room in their budget.

I usually don’t want others analyzing and prioritizing my spending to help me overcome problems.  Avoiding phrases like “we can’t afford” keeps the financial advice at bay.  No one can argue with what I choose and it doesn’t present a problem to solve.

What I Say Instead

I take an active role in my finances by saying what I choose.  For example, before we got an amazing deal on smartphones, I would say “We don’t want to spend money on smartphones right now” instead of “We can’t afford smartphones.”

Other times I will list the alternative: “Going to Six Flags would be fun, but we would rather put more toward our student loans this month.”

If my kids ask for something that costs too much or that I don’t want to spend money on I will tell them “That costs more than I want to spend” or “Let’s see if we can find it at a better price.”  I also try to help them weigh their choices and focus on goals.

Am I Alone?

I very well may be the only one who has an aversion to the phrase “I can’t afford.”

That’s fine.  I’m a word person.  The semantic difference between “I can’t afford __” and “I don’t want to spend money on ___” is very apparent to me.  At the same time, I can see how people who don’t get so linguistically involved would say that they are essentially the same.

In addition to the linguistics, the psychology behind what we say is interesting to me.  If we start speaking less passively, will we become a more active participant in our finances?  Will taking responsibility through our words carry over into our actions?

• Does anyone share my aversion to saying “I can’t afford ___”?  Why do you avoid it?
• Is there a difference to you between “I can’t afford ___” and “I don’t want to spend money on ___?”

The post Why I don’t say “We can’t afford that.” appeared first on Six Figures Under.

We’ve all heard that money can’t buy happiness, but do we believe it?  It’s easy to imagine how money could solve our problems, especially when we’re talking about debt, but is money a requirement for happiness?  Can we be happy on any income?

My belief is that we really can be happy no matter what our bank account or  our paychecks look like.  In fact, I think that being happy where you’re at actually helps you progress faster to where you’d like to be.  Contentment will save you more money and pay off more debt than feeling sorry for yourself will.

Don’t mistake content for “satisfied with the status quo” or “without motivation to make forward strides.”  For me, contentment means being happy at every stage in the game and not letting our circumstances dictate our level of happiness.

Sometimes it’s hard to feel genuinely happy or to pull yourself out of a slump.  Some people have a more natural inclination to happiness while others have to work harder at it.  Here are some of the ways that help me keep my perspective and find joy in the journey, not just at the finish line.

1- Don’t compare

When we compare ourselves with others we are never comparing apples with apples.  Our perspective will always be skewed.  We can never take into account all the facets of their experience, struggles, work, talents, etc, so we will never make a fair comparison.

Don’t ask how much other people make.  Don’t feel jealous of someone’s home or car or job.  Don’t assume that someone else has a perfect life.

When we compare, either we will feel jealous or we will feel prideful.  Neither pride nor jealousy will help you achieve your goals and they certainly won’t make you happy!

2- Focus on your blessings

Instead of dwelling on what we don’t have, let’s focus our attention on what we do have. The more you focus on being grateful, the happier you will be.  There is always a reason to give thanks, even when everything seems to be going wrong.

If you’re really struggling, try making an actual list of the people, experiences, opportunities, and blessings in your life.

When gratitude becomes a habit, happiness will follow.

3- Serve others

When I am in a slump thinking my life is hard, the fastest way to get myself out of it is to go outside myself and help someone else.  It’s amazing how much lighter my burden feels when I let it go so I can carry someone else’s.

Visit someone who’s lonely.  Surprise your spouse with something special.  Read a few extra books to your kids.  Help someone do something hard.

Serving others helps change your attitude and gives you a new perspective.

4- Improve yourself

Improve yourself and do it for the right reasons (see #1).  Set a goal and challenge yourself.  Self-mastery, learning, and personal improvement will be more fulfilling than a perceived competition.

Learn a new skill.  Brush up on an old one.  Memorize something motivational.  Exercise.  Read a book.

Feeling better about yourself will help you to be happy no matter your financial status.

If you aren’t happy when you make $20K, you won’t be happy making $120K because happiness doesn’t come from money.  Can you imagine how much life we waste when we say “I’ll be happy when…” and believe it?

How about you?

• Do you catch yourself saying “I’ll be happy when…”?
• What helps you to be content even when your financial picture isn’t pretty?
• What do you do to pull yourself out of a slump?
• How does being happy help you make progress toward your goals?

You’ll Also Enjoy:

The post Being Happy On Any Income appeared first on Six Figures Under.